I recently came across advice for treating yourself with compassion while changing how you eat and exercise, and thought, “Wow! I have heard these feelings expressed by frustrated tanguera/os!” The main issue is learning to treat YOURSELF with gentleness, as you cannot always count on kindness from dance partners, people at practicas or from your reaction to your video camera. Here are several of the redirections:
I’m bad at this —> I’m new, not bad. Learning takes time.
I always mess this up —> I’m allowed to be imperfect. Being kind to myself helps me keep going.
I’m lazy —> I might be tired, overwhelmed, or stressed. How can I make action easier today?
I have no willpower —> This needs strategy, not more willpower. How can I design this to be easier?
I should be further along by now —> There’s no deadline for this learning process; I’m growing at my own pace.
Everyone else is doing better than I am —> Others’ progress doesn’t erase mine. My journey is mine.
I hope one of these makes your tango week a little easier! They are helping me both with losing weight and getting into the habit of working out more effectively.